i noe wad you all are thinking . coming to find me only when ur bored . telling me ' im/we're always here for you ' . tt's reli just crap . being always thr for me doesn't mean pangseh-ing just to be in front and telling me to find someone else . being thr doesn't mean pretemding to be , when you reli are not . doing a different thing from wad you say . reli , you ppl nonid to pretend . cos i noe frens when i see them . tell me if you dun like me kay ? cos if you do , dunnid to hide . last time , i was so scared ppl dun like me . now , i am also reli scared but PPL tt's who i am . i talk abt wads i wan to talk abt . i act how i wan to act . i wear my uniform the way i wan to wear it . i walk the way i wan to walk . just want to let those idiots out there noe , i may seem like a pushover or wadeva . but i am just born out like tt . so its up to ur conscience whether you'll feel bad treating me this way or not . if you dun , you're a magor freaking heartless idiot . and i din use any vulgarities here . but i wuld if i wanted to . dun think you noe who im talking bout . but just re-read again and again if you have to . im not only talking bout 1 person . its the whole lot of you . seriously , i dun like being alone . loneliness kills me . by now i wuld have been dead . everyone has thr own closer frens in class but whr's mine . nowhere i suppose . i cant even cry in peace , i wan to be myself but are ur letting me ? NO .....

home :

everyone's against me . i got no privacy . when i ask for it .. " wad privacy does a young 13 year old girl like you need ? " well ! i need privacy for things . let me have my own blog . wad use do ur have reading this ?! ur will just feel sad . tt just means ur dun trust me , wun trust me and nvr will . anws , tt's no surprise now . if ur come tell me ' i trust you ' den PROVE IT ! dk how ? too bad .. i need it when i want to cry everything out . now everything is being kept in one place , my heart . one day .. i'll break . where wuld i go .... its reli hard when everybody is against you and tt one person you need is nt here for you . FAMILY ? to me it means nothing . family is not forcing you to do anything you dun wan to do . family is caring for you when necessary and fucking off when i need some space .

haix frens are not frens , family is not family . and freaking counselling doesn't even help . slowly im changing . everyone will notice , im sure . cos ppl only realize me changing for the worst not for the better . i have tried many many times . im not a robot , im human . and i make mistakes too . can ur see the good points before blaming me for everything i do wrong . anyone tt wants to be happy , look at the little good things i did . FORGIVE AND FORGET . im not done but aft posting ppl will only think " wad a stupid girl ! annoying .. " and all tt crap . pls try thinking again . i am a stupid girl but this post ,... haix forget it . im just a screw up den . life has no meaning now . try understanding me for once . i cry not cos i think you all dun understand me , its cos i make you all angry . this is esp to my parents .

ur dun understand . i am a bad daughter , i make ur angry all the time . just leave me alone . let me rot . i'll look aft myself den . and maybe tt's when i will learn . . . .

nvm .

Broke a Rainbow @ 3:29 AM;